Be where you are otherwise you will miss your life. – Buddha

Sometimes there are just too many made-up rules and too many scheduled events running our lives. We live in shreds and snippets instead of flow and fullness. We get caught up in what we think we ought to do or should do with little time to move around in what we love to do or those things that bring us simple joys. But even in the middle of all the chaos life throws at us we can still give ourselves the gift of spaciousness, and something funny happens when we do. The unexpected twist of being fully engaged with the present moment is we finally get what we’ve been searching for, more time.

On one level giving ourselves spaciousness means not rushing through the task at hand. I can’t tell you how many times I begin washing dishes after I’ve already started brushing my teeth. That’s when I feel rushed, that time is my enemy, and that I never have enough of it. To add insult to injury I never really feel fully present in one moment or another, instead I’m half alive in both. This is exactly how we end up never being where we really are and missing out on our lives. We rush through our days, never catching our breath or quite catching up.

On another level, giving ourselves the gift of spaciousness can change the way we interact with the world around us. When we finally slow down enough to open to the present moment we’re in we are showing up in our lives. Then what we are doing matters little compared to how engaged we are when doing it, whether we’re sautéing onions, walking on the beach, or stopped at a red light. When we begin to open up, time opens up. That’s because when we allow ourselves to be in one moment at a time we’re not frantically juggling and distracted or onto what’s next before we’ve finished what we started. We’re firmly planted in the here and now and that’s when time expands to fill the moment.

This is nothing new. The mystics have been on to this for centuries. All new-age and self-help movements talk about this same idea in their own way. The trick comes in remembering. In the end it’s a choice we have to continually make day in and day out. When we give ourselves the gift of spaciousness we are choosing to slow down and fully participate in our lives. That’s when the noticeable shift happens of more space to just be and the feeling of time expanding out. This is where eternity resides, in every little moment of now.

There will always be too much to do but the more we rush through our moments instead of sinking into them the more time we lose and the more closed down we become. It feels counter-intuitive but I can tell you from first-hand experience rushing through a million details to be able to have more free time never works. There’s always just more waiting to be done and our free time never comes. It’s up to us to find that extra time in every little moment of our day. There is an ebb and flow to this practice of spaciousness, sometimes it is second nature and sometimes we forget it completely. As we learn to stay more grounded in each moment as it comes, engaged with one thing at a time, we’ll find our feeling of time changes as our approach to it changes. We may discover that we already have enough time to do what we want with time to spare.

So where can you slow down? Do you have a minute to watch the birds at the feeder, time to sit and have a cup of tea, read ten pages of a book, or do a small something that brings you joy? Can you give all your attention to the task at hand, even the mundane ones? Is it possible to take a deep breath and be right where you are, even if it’s the DMV?

Just begin. Open to any and as many moments as you can, receive the gift of spaciousness and allow your life to expand to meet the moment at hand.

kb