I was at work in the middle of a major project, the kind of project where the farther into it you go the worse everything looks. My co-worker came by to see the progress and completely stressed out, which shook me because he’s the calmest human being on the face of the earth. I just blurted out, take a deep breath. He is also very practical, so his response was, but that won’t change anything, to which my completely unplanned answer was, it will change you.

The spontaneous sideways observation is one of the most profound truths I know and perhaps exactly what we need given the current circumstances. If we can open up to an alternative response rather than being sucked into an immediate reaction our experience of that situation changes. Our perspective shifts, even if only in a very small way or for a very short time. There comes a point in every process, whether it is in our inner or outer world, when it is at it’s absolute messiest. It’s full of problems and questions we can’t answer, feelings we cling to that have no seeming resolution.

It’s also the exact time we find ourselves wanting to speed up and get through it, to find a place where we feel more comfortable. This, however, is not the point. Really these moments and situations are an opportunity to take a closer look. When we are uncomfortable or flustered we tend to make snap decisions that may not be the best for us. They are more like a Band-Aid whose fix doesn’t last.

Often the time of greatest upheaval is exactly the time when we should pause and pay more attention to everything that is going on. And right now we are all being forced to shift gears, turn inwards, take a deep breath, and get more comfortable with the chaos that surrounds us. This is the time, if we are courageous enough, where we are shown what our soul really wants. Being a little off kilter in the chaos provides an opportunity to look at things in new and often refreshing ways.

How do we get comfortable in the most unsettling of times? We take it slow, be kind, and take care of ourselves. We journal, ruminate, take walks in the woods, and let all that is swirling around us shift into the shape it wants to take. Then we see what we think about it. That’s when we’re poised to make the decision that’s best for us.

We may not always like what comes our way but if we have the patience, courage, and strength to see it we can decide which direction we will go rather than being thrown head first into a reaction that doesn’t reflect the truth of the situation. If we can stay calm enough to see and accept what is really going on we will cultivate the ability to have more choices about where we go next.

Here’s to seeing in new ways that brings about real healing.

kb