It is better to fail in originality than to succeed in imitation. – Herman Melville
It feels like I’ve been writing this post for about two years, but it’s taken much longer than that to see the difference between being happy and the joy of owning the truth of what is with no embellishment. It’s easy to forget all the good that is already in our lives, often it just doesn’t look the way we expect it to, and this is the snag that always trips us up. For whatever reasons it’s difficult to see with clarity the things that are actually working in our lives. We nit pick the packaging good fortune arrives in instead of honoring the fact that it comes at all.
When we don’t accept the good that’s already here we begin to believe we have it worse than we really do. This is why all the gratitude journals and books have been so appealing, it’s a reality check. Reminding ourselves of everything that is right in our lives in this moment attunes us to our own unique constellation of qualities, some we love, others we’re learning to embrace, both equally important. Although it’s great to be reminded there’s another step, and that’s consciously accepting all of these strange and beautiful gifts of our self into our hearts, minds, and lives so that the awareness of what has personal meaning and motivation becomes what we celebrate instead of trying to fit a norm. Remembering this for a few minutes in the morning or evening is great, it’s the preparation. What we’re really after is living with the awareness of what uniquely brings us joy and depth all the time, having that as the foundation of everything else we do. That’s how we take the essence of who we are at our core everywhere we go.
How do we accept the multifaceted beauty of our essential self rather than it being a fleeting thought during a busy day? We name it, thank it, own it, open to it, and receive it on every level. The process is equal parts determination and mystery. We have to keep inviting who we really are in again and again. It’s much easier to doubt and hold back, selling ourselves short, thinking what we have to offer is not enough. This thinking keeps us stuck. Somehow seeing our own bright and shiny light is the hardest part. It takes time to learn how to welcome the joy of being who we are with no apologies. Ultimately we are not in control of what moves us with meaning, we can’t direct it, tweak it, or make it go away. All we can do is honor what is, and in turn the person we really are. But this is for certain, the more we engage with what brings us joy, and the more we are willing to let joy into our lives, the more it will come looking for us. And when it finds us we effortlessly break open to the truth of who we are.
This kind of knowing has its own timeline and process and it takes willingness and patience. It’s why it’s taken so long to even write about it. Two years ago it was a lightening bolt of an idea, seeded by untold years of rumination, but still it needed time to grow, time to take up residence within. Then the unexpected miracle comes, after all the writing and thinking and incubating finally the blessing of being enough, as is, becomes a concrete realization. Finally there is deeper understanding and acceptance that who and what we are is just as it should be. Understanding comes in a way that is different and deeper than all imagining, it has a life of its own. It’s another lightening bolt, but this time the electricity stays rooted within. I think it’s really with us all the time, it just needs our attention and nurturing, this is always how the unseen starts to bloom.
Honoring who we are in the fullest way possible is how we accept and live with the blessing of what is. We practice everyday by seeing what’s already in our lives that we love. It helps us sort things out and make choices about what we want to nurture and grow in our lives and what we’re ready to let go of. This process continually shapes our lives and leads us in new and meaningful directions. Then we keep gathering the things that bring joy closer to us day after day, year after year, and watch as it transforms our lives.
Here’s to honoring all our unique qualities that make us who we are.
kb
