Sometimes we have dreams that are just like fairy tales. There is an enchanted wood, a witch, animals that speak, or story lines that are strange and difficult to grasp. Perhaps they are an echo of our  personal unconscious take on a lesson we’re learning, perhaps they are something we have yet to figure out. I’ve had one of these dreams following me around since I was sixteen. It came to me before I’d ever heard of the particular fairy tale it related to, and long before what it had to say made any sense in my life. The fairy tale is The Handless Maiden, and only recently am I piecing together what it’s asked of me; to redeem the feminine in my own way, and on my own terms. Exploring the correlating fairy tale has helped uncover deeper aspects that need attention, and revealed underlying issues. That’s the thing about this type of dream, they bring ideas to the forefront, in a startling manner, long before we are completely conscious of their importance and all their interconnections. They act as a guide if we can really listen, and help fill in the blanks of our life, pointing us to answers we don’t even know we’re looking for. Listening to this unfamiliar voice is at the core of  what it means to redeem the feminine.

At the heart of this dream, that woke me up in a panic all those years ago, was finding a place of honor for the feminine qualities that have been belittled, misunderstood, and repressed. Uncovering and understanding the different layers of the dream let these qualities reemerge and find their rightful place within me. These feminine qualities aren’t just superficial attributes of women, but rather deeper currents of wisdom that run through all of us, men and women. They are the qualities that allow us to appreciate the parts of our self and our life that are non-linear, chaotic, and irrational; all the things that have been dismissed as irrelevant or unimportant. By honoring the call to live with the mystery, by following a hunch, noticing synchronistic events, or uncovering the meaning in random events, we rescue the feminine. It’s in the dark corners of our life that we find the answers to our most sought after questions. These questions can never be answered by the daily routine of life. It’s only by stepping outside of the known that we can find what’s been missing. We honor the feminine by redeeming what’s gone unused within ourselves. And that has everything to do with following  what has heart and meaning for us so we can become more of who we truly are.

“To be ourselves causes us to be exiled by many others, and yet to comply with what others want causes us to be exiled from ourselves.” – Estes

It’s not easy finding the way back to our self. We face sacrificing the comfort of acceptance in order to have the freedom of who we truly are. But this is what the feminine demands, our non-conformity, in creating a place where our individual soul can be heard. There is so much in the world to divert us from the deeper levels of ourselves. We have to be centered enough so we can hear what calls to us for expression. The answers will come if we consistently look and listen, not by the book, not neatly planned and outlined, but in hints and whispers. That is how the feminine functions, we have to pay close attention to the very things we’ve taken for granted or have completely ignored. If we miss out on the gifts the feminine has to offer we miss out on what matters most; connection, relationship, deep feeling, belonging, and a sense of being an integral part of something larger.

The feminine requires diving into the depths without knowing what we’ll find there. It calls us to live deeper and larger. If we look around at what is going on in the world today it’s clear we need to listen to the voice that’s hard to hear, that same voice we’ve been ignoring. The expected and planned daily routine can feel safe, comfortable, and predictable, but the feminine calls for the wild, the uncharted, the thinly veiled. These are where meaningful answers that unlock the mysteries of our hearts come from. We expand who we are by honoring what’s at the edge of becoming. When we do we build a bridge to close the chasm between what is known and what is yet to be known, bringing us more into the light of who we truly are. 

Here’s to finding the voice that’s hard to hear.

kb