Sometimes we have the whole story and still can’t put all the pieces together. I finally saw the movie Spotlight. The most amazing thing about the movie was that they had the whole story many years before, but just didn’t put all the pieces together. They made judgments about the reliability of witnesses and bowed to the pressure from the Catholic church. That got in the way of seeing the truth that was right in front of them. When the story resurfaced, years later, only then did they finally see the pattern and put it all together. Don’t we do exactly the same thing in our own life? We don’t see things for what they really are, we rationalize, make excuses. I think it points to the fact that it’s hard to see the truth. Even when all the facts are laid out before us.

This is exactly what happens with the inner journey as well. We can have all the answers staring us in the face, and just not know how to assemble them. It’s difficult to make sense of all the information. But what we do have are clues. That’s why it’s important to look at everyone and everything in our life. They are the clues that lead us to greater wholeness. Our job is to get better at reading them, to listen to what they’re really saying, instead of only hearing what we want to.

The unconscious has a way of getting us to look at what we need to figure out. It persists. The same dream comes again and again. We are put into the same situation over and over. We will keep being presented with what we need to look at until we relent. In a way it’s comforting, if not exasperating, life will continue to put in our path what we need to address, until we pay attention to it. Rest assured, we will keep getting the chance to look at what we need to heal in our lives, what attitudes we need to adjust, or what horizons we need to expand. That means we have all the pieces, if we choose to look inside.

Then it becomes more like practice. The practice of looking, listening, and seeing. It’s like a muscle, the more we use it the stronger it becomes. We become more adept at putting our pieces together. Then when we are presented with a situation, we’ll be able to see it for what it is, and put the story of our life together in a way that enriches us. It’s always about the process, not the goal. I hate to brake it to you but I don’t think there is a singular pinnacle we finally reach after all the hard work. I think there are a series of goals that become more refined and sublime the longer we do this interior work. It’s more about embracing the work, gathering together the pieces we have, and making sense out of them.

So don’t beat yourself up for not getting it the first time around. That’s typically not the way it works. The real work is in persistence, in wanting to understand, in needing to see the truth. I don’t think there are words enough to describe the gifts received from doing this kind of work. I suppose wholeness, connectedness, and deeper meaning might be a start. But it is so much deeper and delicate than that.

Our lives have stories to tell and secrets to reveal. What inner story remains hidden within you?

kb